I have two sons. Both are on the spectrum, at different points. Both are extremely different in personalities too, so it shouldn't be surprising to me about how different they are with their cleaning.
T, my oldest (he'll be TWELVE on August 26) is also the messiest. He reminds me of Pig Pen from the old Charlie Brown comic strip, Peanuts. I don't have to wonder where he gets it from: he gets it from me.
My father used to call me that when I was little. Little dust clouds just seemed to find me. I remember one time when my sister was in charge of getting me dressed and bathed in the mornings for school. My parents had divorced by this time and my mom worked a lot. So, my sister took over the morning routine to let my mom sleep in after working a late shift. Well, she would do her job just fine, but it never failed that by time I got to school, I was absolutely filthy. I went from our house, ten steps away, waited maybe four or five minutes, got on a bus, rode for an hour, and arrived at the school looking like I hadn't bathed in months. The school called protective services. I pointed out to CPS that it was NEW dirt. LOL
But T... man, his room! I was messy as a teenager. I was a hoarder. But I didn't save TRASH. I wasn't one of those types of hoarders (although if the disease had progressed, I'm sure I would have at some point). T? He saves trash, dirty clothes, toys, dirty plates (I swear he takes them from the sink and puts them under his bed!)...and he hates cleaning it all up.
B? He'll clean up after himself. He has since he was a kid. But after living with T for so long and his parents who are mostly unable, well... he's been slacking too. But naturally, he's the cleanest person in the house. I went the other way after I received treatment for hoarding. It's all the same: OCD. Either you're obsessively clean, or obsessively messy. I didn't realize it was the same thing until years later and went back for more therapy after I also developed compulsions. I'd say B tends to lean towards that side of things.
Now, when it comes to clean up time (1/2 before bedtime starts, it's a kickoff to the bedtime routine), the two react very much alike. Neither one wants to do a thing. They want to finish watching their TV show, or now all of a sudden they remember this or that thing they HAVE to do right then.. etc. This is why it starts 1/2 hour before "bedtime." It really only takes five minutes, max with full cooperation. But it takes 25 minutes of excuses, stalling and whining to get to the full cooperation.
A twitter friend (@CorinaBecker) had recommended a way to get Thomas to be more independent in cleaning his room (right now, I would have to stand in there and point out the things that need cleaning, in a systematic order). She said to draw a visual map of the room, and make "quarters" and have him clean up a quarter at a time. Or whatever works for him but using the map of his room as a visual aid.
So, I had T make the map. He's way better at drawing than I am! He took it seriously, too. He used graph paper so he could draw it to scale and everything. I then took pictures of each quarter of the room so that they fit into his drawing. This was so he could see what it's SUPPOSED to look like when he's "done" cleaning. If he comes out and says, "Done!" I call back to him, "Check your picture!".. and then a few minutes later he'll come back out and say "Done!" and I'll say "Check the next picture!" and he'll go back, and so on until all four quarters are clean.
This may not seem like progress to anyone else, but to me it is. This is a time where my behavior-based time out technique wasn't going to work because I didn't want to PUNISH him. I wanted to TEACH him. We (caregivers, teachers, professionals, anyone who knows anyone with autism) know how difficult it can be going from a state of dependence to independence for our kids. So, I wanted Thomas, who can cook a mean meatloaf all by himself, to be able to clean up his bedroom all by himself. It's a part of life skills that he'll need if he's ever to live on his own with a quality of life that I wish for him.
He's made progress. Yeah,sure, I have to remind him to use the system but the system is there. And yeah, he'll learn to rely on a system instead of just "knowing" but it's a step towards self-directed skills. Right? Right!
So, I made Brandon a map too. He's used it perfectly and absolutely adores it. He says, "Don't change a thing! No more rearranging my room!" **smiles** When we had housemates, we had to rearrange his room and he did not like that at all. But he's used to it now and so doesn't want to change it again. I won't change it again, unless he wants to, of course. I did tell him we COULD rearrange and just take new pictures but if looks could kill, the look he gave me would have knocked me out lightening fast!
So, if your kids have ability to clean but have some executive functioning issues on WHAT to do to make it clean, this idea might help you, too :) (okay, no one mention that I begun using one for the rest of the house too hehe)
Comments (2)
this is an interesting idea
@maniacsicko@xanga - I had thought so as well when I heard of it. It's working beautifully too.